How to waste an hour online while laughing hysterically

http://youknitwhat.blogspot.com/2006/01/return-of-boyfriend-sweater-curse.html

The language is a little salty on some - okay, quite a few - pages, but darn, these folks found some doozies. Let's hope none of my creations ever show up on a similar site ...

Super productive weekend

1. Finished the ballet camisole pattern I found online at

http://magknits.com/July06/ballet.htm

I used a bamboo yarn that I had bought for a different project, and ended up having enough to finish ... but just barely. I have a ball of leftover yarn the size of a walnut, I kid you not. Anyway, I liked the fact that the top is shaped, it's knit mostly in the round, and it's generous enough to cover my bra straps. Perfect!

Now if only the location of the switch from "in the round" to "knit-perl" wasn't so obvious (and right across the middle of my chest) ... I've gotta get my perl tension fixed one of these days.

2. Started and finished a pair of fingerless mittens, which I was trying out to see if I liked the pattern and to learn to do cables. Plus, it used up some of the yarn leftover from the sweater I crocheted a few months ago.

Yet another free pattern I found, this time from:

http://www.virtuallydesigned.com/gottamake/patterns/websurfingmitts.htm

I had originally thought of making a pair of fingerless mittens for my father to wear when he works down at the shipyard (in something more manly than plum wool, of course), but since spring has arrived it looks like I've missed my chance, at least for now. At least now I know how to do a cable ... and since some of the kids we know liked the look of them so much, I've gotten requests for two more sets. I'm working on making them as sweatbands instead of mittens, with the kid's initials instead of the ribs. Should make them the snappiest superheroes on the playground ...

Next up, a cross stitch pattern for Christmas (it's never too early to start, you know), and a third attempt to find a use for some beautiful-but-scratchy wool yarn by Noro. Wish me luck with the frogging!

We've done bought us a house!

We'll be living in Olmsted Township, in a house that's about four blocks away from the first house we ever bought together. It's a great neighborhood (full of swing sets and pools), and it's only a handful of miles from my favorite quilt store, so I'm doubly blessed.

I went ahead and got a PO box to use for our temporary address here, and I'll probably hold onto it permanently for the Lazy Mama mail. If anyone needs to mail me a check (you know who you are!), here's the new address:

Gretchen Woods
Lazy Mama Designs
PO Box 624
North Olmsted, OH 44070

And, of course, you can always email me at lazymamadesigns@yahoo.com.

Once we're past the worst of the phone calls and planning for this move, I'll be visiting the local shops and sending out a newsletter with some new releases. So keep your eyes peeled, and don't hesitate to contact me if you have a special request!

On the move - temporarily

Me, the husband, the kid, the cats, and the sewing machine are all moving up to Cleveland to live in temporary housing. Gonna be one, big happy family in a really big hotel room, for up to two months. Gah.

Anyway, we may or may not be able to connect J's new laptop to the hotel's wireless network, and my computer will be stuck in dial-up-land, so things may be a bit slow on the old blog for a few weeks. Hopefully we'll find the perfect house soon, so we can get settled (and get DSL).

I should still be able to process orders, though, and there are a few new products under development that I hope to roll out soon. So call or e-mail if you'd like to buy anything, and keep checking back for new developments.

Take care, and wish us luck!

- Gretchen

The big news

Lazy Mama headquarters is going to be moving back to Cleveland! Hurrah!

My husband has gotten a promotion and transfer, so two weeks from now my house will be on the market and I'll be living in a hotel room with my kid, my cats, and my husband (and about 15 crochet and cross stitch projects to keep me sane). We'll be starting the house hunt immediately, but we could be in the hotel for as long as two months. Gahhhhh ...

Needless to say, my internet access is going to be a little spotty, but I'll be keeping up with any Lazy Mama business to the best of my ability. So bear with me if it takes an extra day or two to get back to you or process your order - I'm doing my best!

On a side note, this will give me the chance to finally type up a couple of projects I've had floating around in my head for the last few months. And it was the perfect excuse to tidy up my studio and office, both of which are now looking depressingly sterile. I mean, seriously, how can I be expected to work in a space like this:

Jeez, I'd actually have to pick up all the threads I trim and not have a foot-tall stack of unfinished projects fall over every time I need use the cutting table. We creative types just can't be expected to flourish under those conditions :)

Finished, finally

The skirt, which I talked about here, finally has a matching top. I give you, the Gretchen-designed tank top of doom, which was completely ripped out and restarted at least twice, and is still a little funky on one side, but at least it covers my bra straps and it's done. Hurrah! Now I can move on to that cute little green knit tank top I've been dying to do since Christmas. That'll give me something to do in the hotel room for the next two months, I guess.

Unusually Useful Receiving Blanket pattern page

Unusually Useful Receiving Blanket Pattern

Every new mother receives tons of receiving blankets as gifts, and 95% of them are useless – they’re either the wrong shape to swaddle a baby, or made of dry clean only fabric, or so bulky that the kid would sweat to death if you actually used it.

This receiving blanket, on the other hand, is just about perfect. It’s big and square, so it’s perfect for swaddling. But don’t stop there – you can use this for so many other things! This blanket has been used to: swaddle babies, protect babies from the sun in strollers, keep babies sitting upright in strollers and high chairs, protect adult laps from diaper leakage during nursing, protect the carpet from urps during tummy time, cover up during public nursing sessions, give babies something familiar to sleep with when traveling, etc. And the best part is, you can whip a couple of these up during one naptime, so they’re perfect to make for yourself or for friends who are expecting. Oh, and did I mention they’re cheap and washable? Approximate finished size: 40" square.

This is a perfect pattern for people who are just learning to sew, or for experienced sewers who need to turn out a baby gift pronto. Because the patterns is very inexpensive, and it requires about 1 1/2 yards of flannel, this pattern should be very profitable for you!

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in less than one naptime (two hours).

Photos from the pattern:

Mitering the corners

How to swaddle

Pattern includes color photographs of the sewing and swaddling procedures, and it is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $1.50/pattern

Suggested retail price: $3-$4, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Jack Pack pattern page

Jack Pack Pattern

The Jack Pack is ideal for corralling blocks, trains, doll clothes, and other small toys. It would also work as a preschool backpack. Decorate the optional (but highly recommended) pocket to label the contents or identify who owns the bag. Skip the pocket and use the suggested shortcuts, and you can have a pack out the door in about an hour.

This pack looks cute made of juvenile or novelty fabrics, and even cuter when made of "hipper" fabrics for tween or adult use. A great first project for new sewers, the Jack Pack requires a little quilting, a little embellishing, a little fancy stitching, and a drawstring pocket.

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in about one naptime (2 hours).

Photos taken from the directions:

Embellishing the pocket

Leaving room for the straps to come through

Pattern includes illustrated directions and a full-size template for the bottom of the pack, and it is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $4.00/pattern

Suggested retail price: $7-$9, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

NEW!! You can also place orders through my shop at etsy.com - just convo me with a request, including the number of patterns you'd like to buy, and I can post a custom listing for you at the wholesale price.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Happy Hexagons Placemat pattern page

Happy Hexagons Placemat Pattern

Delight your little one (and keep your table clean) with this easy holiday project. If you can sew a straight seam, you can make these cute placemats, perfect for decorating your home or giving as gifts. They go together super-fast, thanks to a technique that combines appliqué and quilting in one easy step. Use novelty prints to make these for a holiday (like in the sample above), or use subdued fabrics for a more traditional look. No matter which you choose, these placemats just get better each time they’re washed!

Raw-edge applique techniques make this placemat simple to construct, and the pattern goes together so quickly that your customers can make a set for every holiday! Perfect to display with your seasonal and novelty fabrics, this pattern also looks nice when made using all-over prints.

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in about one naptime (2 hours).

Some of the photos that illustrate the directions:

Template placement to fussy-cut the hexagons

Turning the corner on the binding

Pattern includes illustrated directions, a full-sized template for the hexagon, illustrated binding directions, and suggestions for additional variations on the project. Pattern is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $4.00/pattern

Suggested retail price: $7-$9, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

NEW!! You can also place orders through my shop at etsy.com - just convo me with a request, including the number of patterns you'd like to buy, and I can post a custom listing for you at the wholesale price.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Busy Baby Book pattern page

Busy Baby Book Pattern

Treat that new arrival as an excuse to raid your fabric stash (or hit the store for new goodies!) to make a soft cloth book to stimulate all of baby’s senses. Choose washable fabrics in bright colors with bold contrasts, or pick fabrics that have a variety of different textures. Go crazy with the embellishments, adding more color and texture with fabric scraps, yarn, or whatever you have handy.

This pattern would be perfect to display near your selection of fat quarters, or it could easily be made into kits using the awkward ends leftover from your finished bolts of cloth. It looks adorable made in black-and-white prints with bright accents, or it can be made in a variety of diffent colors and textures of scrap fabrics.

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in about one naptime (2 hours).

Pattern includes illustrated directions and is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $4.00/pattern

Suggested retail price: $7-$9, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

NEW!! You can also place orders through my shop at etsy.com - just convo me with a request, including the number of patterns you'd like to buy, and I can post a custom listing for you at the wholesale price.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Simple Snowflakes Table Runner pattern page

Simple Snowflakes Table Runner Pattern

Temperatures (and snow) may be falling outside, but your table will look cozy under this simple quilted table runner. The blue and white color scheme will dress up your table all winter long, while variations in green or red make quick holiday gifts.

Snowflake appliques are applied using a raw-edge technique that allows them to get fluffier each time they're washed. Approximate finished dimensions: 36”x12”

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in about two naptimes (4 hours).

Some of the photos that illustrate the directions:

Placing the template

Turning the corner when binding

Pattern includes illustrated directions, a full-sized template for the snowflake, illustrated binding directions, and suggestions for additional variations on the project. Pattern is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $4.00/pattern

Suggested retail price: $7-$9, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

NEW!! You can also place orders through my shop at etsy.com - just convo me with a request, including the number of patterns you'd like to buy, and I can post a custom listing for you at the wholesale price.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Basket Case Baby Quilt pattern page

Basket Case Baby Quilt Pattern

Small pieces make a big impact in this faux-woven quilt, which gets fluffier and more touchable every time it’s washed. Sure, the pinning will make you a “basket case,” but you only have to sew 35 seams!

This quilt features raw-edge applique which is applied to look as if the strips are woven. A quick trip through the wash fluffs up the edges and softens the effect. Approximate finished dimensions: 40”x40”.

A person with average sewing skills should be able to finish this project in about four naptimes
(8 hours).

Alternate colorway sample, made using bright flannels:

Pattern includes illustrated directions plus suggestions for additional variations on the project. Pattern is packaged in a resealable plastic bag (6"x9"), ready to hang and sell.

Wholesale price: $4.00/pattern

Suggested retail price: $7-$9, or whatever the market will bear in your area

Free shipping on your first order! Shipping charges for subsequent orders will be the actual charges for USPS Priority Mail to your destination.

I am willing to make free samples to display in your shop, if you are willing to provide the materials. Please contact me for more information on this service.

For more information or to place an order, please contact Gretchen Woods at Lazy Mama Designs: lazymamadesigns (at) yahoo (dot) com.

NEW!! You can also place orders through my shop at etsy.com - just convo me with a request, including the number of patterns you'd like to buy, and I can post a custom listing for you at the wholesale price.

Thank you for your interest, and I hope to hear from you soon!

Kid sweater of the week

Have I mentioned recently how much I love crochet? Soooo much. I started this at the hotel in San Diego, and only got to work on a little bit of it before we got home. A week after we're home, and it's done!

I made enough changes from the pattern I used for inspiration that I think we'll just consider this a Lazy Mama creation. Done in Paton's mercerized cotton, with three skeins leftover that are totally going back to Michael's tomorrow. Meanwhile, Liza loves her "new setter, new setter, new setter," to use her words. Threw a hissy fit when I tried to take it off of her this afternoon - that's always a good sign!

Depending on the kindness of strangers

We're just back from a vacation in San Diego, where I made an honest attempt to visit every quilt store in the county. That's a tall order, considering there are more than a dozen of them, and I was trying to fit in the visits around sightseeing with my family and visiting my sister-in-law. We did a lot of "Gretchen goes into the shop while Liza sleeps and Jason reads a book in the car," which was good in a way - no time to lollygag and shop too long when there's a cranky toddler waiting outside.

At first I wasn't sure how the area could support so many shops, but once I checked out their inventories, it became obvious that each store focuses on a different niche market. It's great, because each store has a REALLY good selection of fabrics and patterns within their niche - primitives, reproductions, brights, flannels, novelties, Asian fabrics, etc. I could tell almost immediately when I walked into a store whether they might be interested in buying my patterns.

You didn't think I was just visiting all these places to shop, did you? Silly, silly reader! I was selling like no tomorrow, and thanks to the kindness of some lovely ladies who didn't know me from Adam (or Eve), my patterns are now officially distributed in California! Thank you, Sue, Sue, and Karen!

So if you're near San Diego, check out the following shops for a selection of my work:

Quilter's Paradise

Mad Hatter's Quilt Box

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a boatload of patterns to print, and new patterns to type up. I'm all chock full of inspiration and ambition now that my patterns are distributed in three states. Maryland, Delaware, and Pennsylvania - I'm coming for you at Easter!

Lazy Mama Designs - now available in Kentucky!

Thanks to Teresa Fritz at Corner Quilt Shop in Lexington, you can now buy my patterns within an hour's drive of my house! If you're in the area, be sure to stop by and say hi to the Jack Pack and Happy Hexagon Placemat displays!

The Corner Quilt Shop153 Patchen Dr. #67Lexington, KY 40517(859) 268-7467

Ahoy, matey!

My newest knit sweater is finished, and it's a smiling skull and crossbones for Kentucky's cutest pirate:

It's from a book I picked up at Christmas, Adorable Knits for Tots. There are plenty of other projects in there that I'm just itching to try, so you'll be seeing that title a lot in the next year or so.

Some thoughts on this project:

• Working a design that requires 8 different spools of yarn at once sucks.
• Finding out that you bound off the neck too tight - after you've sewn the neck and shoulder seam and worked all the loose ends in - sucks.
• Patterns that come in sizes 1-2 and 3-4 suck. I made it in the 1-2 (Duh. Dumb move), and it's going to fit her for about a minute and a half. As a matter of fact, the sleeves were already an inch too short by the time she took it off after dinner.
• Cheap synthetic yarn from Wal-Mart rocks ... at least when the wearer is too young to know the difference. The total cost for the two balls of yarn I needed for this project was under $10.
• I'm getting faster at the whole knitting thing. By the end of the sweater, I could bang out 1.5 stripes on the sleeves in the course of one Baby Einstein video. Because you know that's how I measure projects now, right?
• Thanks to my friends Sybil and Matt for convincing me not to use the white for the pattern on the front - it would have totally blended in and made this an even bigger waste of time than it was already.

Exciting news

While I was up in Cleveland over the weekend I stopped by my favorite quilt shop to interview the owners for a story I'm shopping around to some quilt magazines. I had them take a look at the patterns I've developed, and they're interested in selling them in the store! They even said they'd like the prototypes of the projects so they could make a nice display and do it as a trunk show.

Not only will my patterns soon be for sale in a real store, they even liked them enough to give me $40 in free fabric to remake the sample for the basket case quilt. Hoorah! After six hours of work today, I've got all of the patterns printed and updated with their suggestions (such as incorporating my Nap Rating system into the packaging) and all of the prototypes packaged up to send up north. Now I just have to buckle down and remake the quilt. Anyone want to come help me pin 160 little pieces of flannel?

In the interest of cross-promotion, be sure to check out their site, or stop by if you happen to be near Olmsted Falls, OH. You can find them at http://www.abigayles.com/ .

Thanks, Deb and Nancy!

Another etsy shop I love

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=17579

How cute is the giant hamster? Really cute.
It's a 7-inch-tall hamster (that's the size of a soccer ball):

And the uber-cute (but much smaller) hedgehog:

And the "monster boss" pillow, complete with working pocket and buttons on the back:

Must ... not ... spend ... $60 ... on a huge hamster ...

Crawling out from under the crafting rock

I've been in the zone, trying to finish a sweater, so that I can move on to all the other projects that sound like much more fun than something crocheted out of chunky wool. That means I've been devoting all of my evenings (and some nap times, too) to yarn, not blogging, which is why I've been sort of quiet this week.

You can tell I'm Mama first, crafter second nowdays ... when Jason asked me how much longer before I'd be able to sew it together, I told him I'd probably be able to finish by the end of the next Baby Einstein video. I actually needed to use the special features on the DVD to drag it out long enough to finish, but I was pretty close.

So here it is:

And yes, that's my minty fresh bathroom, and yes, those are my pajama bottoms, which I didn't change out of until about 4:30 today ... now that's what I call a Good Day!!

On a technical note, I've been having some crochet gauge issues with the Happy Hooker patterns, so I took the time to make a guage swatch for this sweater before I started. I never do that. Figures that the time I check it, I was exactly on the money. Since all of my projects from the Happy Hooker book have been too small ... way, way too small ... and this pattern was from a different source, I'm starting to think that the folks at Stitch n Bitch crochet ridiculously loosely. My next two adult projects (that's projects for me, not the kid ... get your mind out of the gutter!) are from the Happy Hooker, so I'll let you know how many sizes of hook I have to go up to get the gauge right. I'm guessing at least two or three.

Oh, and here's how the challenge quilt is coming. I'm 3/8ths of the way done!

Actually, more than that, since I've finished one of the two fiendishly difficult blocks (see the overlapping stars in the bottom right corner? Had to paper piece the blue ones, then paper piece the pieced pieces into place exactly right so the points would line up ... and I got them right the first time, thank god). Hooray!

This is the first time that I've actually cared enough about a quilt to RESEW things that aren't exactly right. See how all the star points touch, and aren't cut off, and the folds that you can't see in the photo pretty much line up? That's because I've gone back and ripped out and redone at least one seam in every block, and usually sewn the block intersections at least 1 1/4 times each. And I've yet to curse at it ... not counting when I cut the fabric too small for the purple star, but that's allowable, as it means I'm going to have to order another piece of fabric to finish the quilt.

Check the shop for new patterns ... and I've got another one coming soon, as soon as I get off my butt and write it up.

New in the shop

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=5196880

Lazy Mama's Simple Snowflakes Table Runner, which takes those paper snowflakes you made as a kid and makes them look all fancy and quilted. Raw edge applique is very forgiving of mistakes, and the pattern is simple enough that you can finish it in a few hours. Check out the blue-and-white, use-all-winter color scheme, or get a jump on next year's holiday gifts by making one in red, green, or blue/silver.

This would be a great introduction to quilting for anyone with basic sewing skills, and it's interesting enough to keep even experienced quilters hooked. Lavishly illustrated directions, a full-sized template for the snowflakes - this pattern is a steal at only $5!